When I moved to Tanzania, I prayed time and time again for a desire to cook. Whether it was traditional American food or recipes from a new land, I knew I would need this to survive without the convenience of Chick-fil-A or a microwave.

I believe my God continuously answers this prayer as I experiment in the kitchen and enjoy it. I’m more of a go-with-the-flow cook, meaning I would rather throw random ingredients in a pan than look at a recipe. I can cook the same thing multiple times, and it will never turn out the same way, and honestly, I think that’s part of the fun!

Sometimes, things don’t go according to plan. The bread catches fire, the cake doesn’t rise, the soup boils over, or the food-to-seasoning ratio is way off. (I’m embarrassed to say all these have happened to me in the last few months.) The meal is usually unsalvageable when this happens, but that isn’t always the case. Sometimes, things appear like they aren’t going according to plan, but I need to trust the process.

Take, for example, this week:

After visiting my local farmers’ market, I came home with two beautiful eggplants. This purchase was strictly based on color alone, as I had no idea what to do with this unusual vegetable. After a quick Google search, I decided to attempt a Middle Eastern recipe called Baba Ghanoush. The picture looked exactly like hummus, which I love. So, I thought to myself, what could possibly go wrong?

I followed the directions to a T, not something I usually do when cooking.

Step One: roast the eggplant. Once it is golden brown in color and soft to the touch, remove the skins and put the eggplant in a mesh strainer to remove any extra liquids.

That seemed simple enough. Once the eggplant filled my kitchen with the earthy aroma of roasted vegetables, I removed it from the oven and began peeling off the skin. The recipe failed to mention that the “golden brown” color may be more greyish, greenish brown. I thought I must have bought rotten eggplants.

Nothing about this sticky, ugly mess looked appetizing to me. I considered throwing it out and just having a peanut butter sandwich for dinner. But it wasn’t the final product, and there were many more steps until the Baba Ghanoush would be complete.

Instead of giving up, I decided to trust the process. This adventure had two possible endings:

I would waste the next 30 minutes of my life cooking a rotten mess, OR
I would follow the remaining steps and end up with a delicious treat!

I followed the remaining directions, unsure of the outcome. Luckily, the second option was the winner, and if you have never tried Baba Ghanoush and you like hummus, it’s delicious!

Through cooking, God has taught me so much about what it looks like to grow as I walk with him into the unknown. As much as we may want to, it is impossible to skip to the end without going through all the steps.

There are times when life feels like a sticky, ugly mess. Amid growing pains and uncontrollable circumstances, I often think nothing beautiful could come from a season like this. In those moments, God reminds me that what feels uncomfortable is just a tiny part of the story in which he is working together for his good and glory.

Sometimes, life may feel like it’s on fire, has too much or not enough seasoning, or feels like it’s just not coming together. But through it all – my job? I want to trust the process and remember that my God is in control.